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Following the conclusion of this weekend’s round of Premier League fixtures, football fans have what promises to be an exceptionally long, uninspiring and largely inconsequential international break to endure. In most parts of the world, various nations have nothing more exciting than friendlies scheduled. In Europe, it’s the return of the Nations League. A competition apparently conceived for no other reason than to allow Cristiano Ronaldo to spuriously claim he has won two major international trophies, this Uefa wheeze is about to kick off for the fifth time. Almost unique among tournaments that have enjoyed such longevity, its format remains fairly baffling to many of those who will actually be playing in it and all but the keenest students of the game. In truth, hardly anyone cares about the Nations League and quite literally nobody gives two hoots about its opening games.

I met Ludek Miklosko once. In fact, shaking my hand was one of the first things he had to endure after signing for West Ham in the summer of 1990. (The history books say he signed earlier, but he wasn’t officially unveiled until the summer.) I was working in…

I…